Pain comes from trying to hang on to what is trying to move on.
I learned this as a Buddhist proverb, but it has many variations. I was twenty-something when I first heard it. Many, many sun-circles ago.
Pain is a signal that your attention is required. Immediately.
But suffering is a choice. Of course I’m talking about emotional suffering, psychological suffering, spiritual suffering. But even physical suffering can be included to some degree, as many pain-management strategists can tell you.
The actual pain signals are a result of synaptic signals firing between your nerves and your brain. They signal for no more than 9 short seconds.
The rest of your painful suffering experience is carried on by your story you tell yourself about the original pain signal. Yes. Your thoughts. Over and over again, looking at the triggering event from this way and that way.
Your stressful story about your woundedness releases stressful hormones, not the other way around.
I am a master of releasing emotional suffering. I had to master it because I would be dead otherwise. You see, I had multiple suicide attempts as a young woman, resulting from what I can see now were simply misguided temper tantrums because I wasn’t getting my own way.
I believed life was against me, that I was incredibly stupid for not “getting it” and I couldn’t find anyone to love me. All this proved to me that I was worthless.
My ego, that had been exalted all throughout my school years, was stripped bare. I was egoically exhausted, and my soul was finally able to be heard.
I’m here to tell you that you don’t have to wait for life to beat your ego down into exhaustion before you allow your soul to guide your life. They can be a happy partnership, ego and soul.
The key to a happy ego-soul relationship is to hold on to your dreams and desires lightly, and to release them easily when life makes it very clear that there are other plans for you. Because those other plans invariably lead to better outcomes than your original plans.
I can prove it. Think back to some of the most painful times of your life … the ones where you were on the floor in foetal position, crying your heart out. I would suggest that your life was pivoted at those moments into unplanned directions that led to new unsuspected joys.
These are what we, in Priestessing circles, call Initiations.
Sometimes the initiations are planned and prepared for.
Sometimes you can see them coming, and you can brace yourself.
Sometimes they come out of fucking nowhere, and you are swept helplessly along.
Initiations strip your ego to the bone. You MUST let your soul lead at these times. Your soul is your infallible compass for your joy, your peace, your fulfilment.
Humanity is at a point of evolutionary transformation. And many women sense this in their blood. They have come here as leaders to guide in this transformation.
There is a massive collective yearning that this vanguard of transformational leaders carries … but there have been no containers for this yearning to be poured in to. So many transformational-leaders-in-waiting looked for the next best fit which would serve as incubators while these yearnings matured.
Many were led to become qualified in psychology, coaching, teaching, healing modalities, so they could take their role as helpers.
Many were guided to start businesses so they could be free and independent from the 9 to 5 hamster wheel. And to develop effective platforms for influence.
But there’s a catch. You see, Soul, in and of itself, cannot take structured action.
Actions of Soul separated from ego, can look capricious, psychotic, hysterical, abasing, and off with the fairies. Exquisite beauty mixed with terrifying chaos.
Soul doesn’t sense boundaries.
Take this on board … Soul. Does. Not. Do. Boundaries.
Of itself and the world around it, between people, of animate and inanimate objects.
In the physical world, Soul only senses energy and movement.
In the non-physical world, Soul has yearnings and desires.
The Soul has access to every corner of the cosmos, in every dimension. It can retrieve answers to every question ever imagined.
Soul’s language is how these energies, movements, yearnings, desires and answers make it feel. The body is the canvas for these feelings.
The soul is not limited to the five senses, nor to time and space.
It is everywhere and no where, tomorrow, today, last lifetime.
It makes no judgements about anything. It does pain and pleasure equally well.
When incarnated as a human being, the soul needs the compassionate protection and support of the ego.
Because the ego provides the direction and action, and most importantly, the boundaries, so that Soul’s gifts can flow into the world.
The Soul is the elixir, the Ego is the jar.
Soul and Ego need each other for transformational alchemy and evolution.
So when your next Initiation presents itself, let your actions be guided by the whispers of your Soul, and abandon the stories about how things should be. Wailing and sobbing are optional, particularly if they feel cleansing.
This is how to move through your frequency-upgrade initiations and fears with the most possible grace and the least discomfort.