You either are, or you are not. It’s one of those binary decisions you need to make about your own life.
And whatever is true for you is also true for everyone else.
And no, you can’t settle for an in-between number, like 30% or 75%. All or nothing. I’ll talk more about this a little further on.
If you choose to be 100% responsible for your own life, congratulations! You have just taken a quantum leap beyond how almost everyone else feels about their life – lost, helpless, victimised, out of control.
Truthfully, the ‘authorities’ like it like that. They like you, and everyone else, to feel like a piece of flotsam just being tossed around on the oceans of life. Because it lets them play the big brother to the hilt: “I’ll come and save you. I’ll restore calm and order and harmony in your life.”
So all of advertising, all of our social services, all of our politicians serve to unsettle your sense of control over your own life. They blame, they shame, they search for a scapegoat to hold accountable and sacrifice. Excuses exist for everything and anything. Why this didn’t happen, why that did happen. Why you didn’t get that job you were after, why you got that traffic ticket.
Living without 100% responsibility for your life invites and encourages a fundamental dishonesty that everyone can agree on. Consensus reality. Matrix reality. Patrix reality.
Not accepting 100% percent responsibility for your own life also perpetuates your blind spots about they dynamics and patterns in your own life, by looking externally for the cause of any dramas they may support.
Now, what I’m saying is not new to most of you. Intellectually and theoretically you’ve encountered this idea before and even maybe passively agreed with it. But applying it to your own life and actually living as if you’re accepting full responsibility is another kettle of fish entirely.
Most of us are willing to go so far as to own our own stuckness and our limiting beliefs. But what about when, just as we are on the threshold of our big breakthrough and …
We get sick
Our spouse or our child gets sick
We lose our job
The roof in your bathroom caves in
You’re involved in a car accident
An unexpected bill comes out of nowhere.
Should we also accept responsibility for these events? Absolutely!
This is where we come back to understanding the operating systems of our left brain and our right brain.
Your left brain – your logical and strategic brain – is the home of the ego, which I like to think of as the interface between Spirit and the World. The ego is the “I” who is acting in the world. It is that which you refer to when you say “I am …”, “I think …”, “I love …”, “I hate …”, and so on.
The ego has recorded information useful to your life from the moment you were born, before you could even speak, and before your brain was developed enough to make discerning decisions about the truth of situations and events. And also keep in mind that these early impressions formed the bedrock of your later, more sophisticated thought processes. The ego stores every piece of information it has ever gathered, and every insight it has ever had. The subconscious is its basement and it firmly holds the key.
Yes, it had a tough job to do, with little instruction and an underdeveloped piece of equipment – your brain. And yes, I have a compassionate respect for the ego. You’ll never read from me about annihilating it. But I will guide you towards building a new kind of relationship with it.
Anyway, your egoic left brain is a master manifester in its own right and whenever it determines that you’re moving into dangerous territory by taking too many risks, it will create a situation that moves you back into the comfort zone almost immediately. Your safety and your survival are its primary goals. Think of your ego as an overzealous bodyguard who creates a diversion whenever your wings flutter like they’re going to whisk you away to new horizons soon.
Whenever an incident occurs in your life that suddenly blocks your progress, recognise your own inner bodyguard in action. It is a master player in the Law of Attraction game.
So what about the following scenarios …
Terrible things happened in my childhood. Am I responsible for that?
Yes, indeed, but possibly not at the ego level. Here, you need to acknowledge your true identity as Soul, and one who has come into physical form. A particular family was chosen in order for the personality to be shaped in a particular way through childhood experiences and/or a particular genetic or cultural heritage, to lay the foundation for the life purpose work it came to fulfil.
There is also the concept of karma that needs to be considered. Relationships are definitely bound by karma.
That is not to say that all situations of childhood abuse are retributive karma. Many souls are coming in at this time to help end the cycle of violence and abuse going from one generation to the next one. Many souls are helping to heal that aspect in our culture, to raise it up from the shadows and bring it to the light for healing and forgiveness and restoration to love.
Being 100% responsible for our lives does not imply that we are to blame or are guilty for having caused something horrible to happen to us. For you, but for no one else either. Blame and guilt do not come from a place of love. Being 100% responsible for our lives does not mean that others are not accountable for their actions of harm towards you – they have their soul and karma journey to travel also. Lives are woven together over many lifetimes.
Like the Law Of Attraction, you have to decide whether it either works 100% of the time, or not. It doesn’t just work to bring you good things, but the bad things are someone else’s doing.
This recent daily broadcast of one of Abraham-Hicks messages sums it up nicely: You don’t have to go back and deal with childhood issues, because those childhood issues produced a vibration within you that you are still offering — which is producing today issues. You can shift your vibration a whole lot easier when you’re dealing with today issues, than trying to deal with childhood issues. It’s the same vibration. That vibration that was creating childhood issues, now it’s creating today issues. Deal with it in your now. “Which thought feels better? Which thought feels better? Which thought feels better?”
But I just lost my job, through no fault of my own. Am I responsible for that?
Yes, you are. But, you know, this may not, in fact, be as bad a thing as you may be imagining. The left brain ego likes routine and predictability.
I have bad genes that are responsible for my medical condition. Are you saying I’m responsible for that also?
I have others to care for, and my life isn’t really my own to do with as I want. How does 100% personal responsibility fit in with that?
Shouldn’t the government be watching out for me? Isn’t that what we elect them for?
How can I be responsible for sudden emergencies that happen out of the blue?
3 Laws of Personal Responsibility
1. You are 100% responsible for your choices and your attitudes.
2. Do not expect others to do for you what you can, and should, do for yourself.
3. Don’t do for others what they can, and should, do for themselves.
Like Jill Bolte Taylor noted, Take responsibility for the energy you bring into this room.